Dear Friends,

The other day, a friend told me about something she had done that she regretted. It was a simple, understandable mistake, one that I was sure could be remedied with an apology.

“You’re human,” I told her. “You’re allowed to have feelings and make mistakes.”

It was so easy for me to give her that feedback, because I believe it in my bones, and because I care about her. But a few days later, I made a mistake of my own, and I beat myself about it. The truth is I‘m not always as generous and understanding with myself as I am with others.

Maybe it’s because I’m a perfectionist people pleaser (say that fast five times). When I stumble off my carefully carved path, I am quick to judge myself. I dwell on what I could have done differently, playing it over and over and over in my mind, and the voice in my head, well, it’s kind of mean.

The wonderful Brené Brown said, “Talk to yourself like you would to someone you love.”

I’m trying.

I think about Lil Christine* doing something silly or stupid—knowing better but doing it anyway, then regretting it the moment it’s done. I imagine her feeling awful, sitting on her white iron trundle bed, crying into one of the ruffly pink pillows. And I imagine what I would tell her.

“You’re human. You’re allowed to have feelings and make mistakes.”

I’d probably add, “Sometimes, good enough is good enough.” I’d explain how Perfect doesn’t exist, but Ordinary can be exquisite. I’d share that making an effort is often heroic, and being kind can be life changing.

Then I’d give her a hug. We could all use more hugs.

xo Christine

*Lil Christine is my younger self, also the star of the comic above.

Good Things

• The slow bloom of a bunch of Trader Joes daffodils

• Rewatching Shōgun with Henry

• A good hair day

• Tiny gold bow earrings on tiny ear lobes

• Blue cotton candy clouds

• Old mixes as time capsules

• Gift cards when you need them most

• Dinner with ladies I’ve known since our kids were in preschool together (and splitting a perfectly cooked steak and fries)

• Our annual field trip to The Cheech (aka The Cheech Marin Center for Chicano Art & Culture) and Tacos Gavilan

• Marriage is like a slumber party

Good Buys

I make a Trader Joes run every week, and I love my time weaving in and out of the aisles. The store is jam packed with delicious ingredients, snacks, sauces, and treats. I often ask the people who work there what their favorites are, so I thought I’d share mine with you. A few recent repeat purchases: Blood Orange Mochi ice cream, Icelandic Skyr vanilla yogurt, Soft Pretzel Twists, Beef Bulgogi, and the Milk Chocolate Bar with Corn Flakes. If you shop at TJs, what are your faves?

Good Quote

Good Deed of the Day

Hold the door open for someone. Flash ‘em a smile, too.